The Veiled Lives of the Ultra-Rich: An Undercover Journey

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Have you ever wondered what it takes to cater to the 0.001%? To uncover the secrets of satisfying the obscenely rich, Brandon Presser embarks on an extraordinary journey, blending in with the experts who know how to keep these individuals happier than ever.

The World of the Wealthy: A Secret Exposed

What if I told you that the lives of the wealthy are often documented in a "Mean Girl's burn book"? It's a hidden truth that Presser has discovered, turning his findings into a captivating column for Bloomberg. But how does one gain such intimate insights? The secret lies in his unique approach, turning clients into cartoons to protect their identities while sharing their stories.

Disguised Among the Luxurious

Presser's journey involves donning various uniforms, each a transformation into a different role. From a butler at the Plaza to a maitre d' at Nobu, his experiences are as diverse as the luxurious jobs themselves. Despite the nerves that come with the territory, he always manages to dive deep, extracting the raw honesty that brings his column to life.

A Travel Obsession and the Predictable Elite

A confessed travel addict, Presser has an intimate understanding of the ultra-rich's habits. Their travel patterns are as predictable as their preferences for certain resorts and destinations. The question is, how does one navigate this world while maintaining the highest level of service?

The Triangle of Sadness and the Art of Service

In this world, understanding one's client is key. Money, power, and fame form the Triangle of Sadness, and to serve the elite, one must diagnose their desires and cater to them accordingly. Presser shares his recent experience at The Carlyle Hotel, where he learned the art of making the perfect Martini, cleaning rooms, and even welcoming a VIP with special amenities for their dog.

When the Wealthy Act Like Children

The demands of the rich can be absurd, but fulfilling them can be surprisingly enjoyable. Presser recounts a time when he was asked to read "Eloise" as a bedtime story to a group of adults, a testament to the whimsical nature of luxury service.

The Two Types of Ultra-Rich Individuals

Presser identifies two distinct types of individuals in the realm of ultra luxury: those who live with absolute certainty and those who suffer from analysis paralysis. Serving the former is straightforward, while the latter presents a unique challenge. The key is to deliver a sense of certainty to those who need it most.

The Respect Due to Luxury Workers

Presser expresses his admiration for the workers who toil around the clock to cater to the whims of luxury clients. Their dedication is unwavering, and Presser ensures he never takes advantage of their passion.

Behind the Velvet Curtain

In an era where access is everything, Presser offers a glimpse behind the velvet curtain, sharing the receipts and stories of the elite. His journey is a testament to the human side of luxury, revealing the extraordinary efforts made to satisfy the 0.001%.

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